Too much to do

WARNING Don't read this. I just had to get this out of my head. Should have written it in my journal but here it is.
I don't feel like doing anything and yet I have too much to do. I want to just sit outside and read in the shade or go to the pool and swim all by myself. But this afternoon I ran here and there getting signatures on forms for summer school field trips. I found out we don't have enough money to pay the admission fees for the field trips and don't really have enough money for the buses either. The whole idea is to get the kids to places they don't usually go. There isn't money to buy the new summer reading books either, so I may end up buying them myself.
After getting the paperwork to the final office, I went to see my dad. He goes over the same concerns almost every time I visit. He doesn't like it there and wants to go home. There isn't any way he can go home because there is no one to care for him. Mom is not well enough and everyone else is working. I feel really guilty when I read about other families who take their elders into their homes. This stresses me but I don't think I could take the stress of the alternative any better. I don't like this 'season' of my life.